My Barks!

All of my EPIC BARKING!! Just miscellaneous thoughts I dump here, right into your eyeballs! I'm off Bluesky now, so this is where all my stupid shower thoughts go now!

1/13/2025

I forgot to post about this yesterday, but IT WAS A FULL MOON LAST NIGHT AWOOO!! AWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!

- 1/12/2025 (pt 2)

OHOHOHOHO A DOUBLE BARK!

When I was a kid, I used to be really annoyed that the live-action Alvin and the Chipmunks didn't look like their cartoon counterparts and were more tiny feral lil guys.

As an adult, I realize that was almost certainly for the better. I'll admit, as...something as those films are, I'd rather watch a film about tiny CGI chipmunks in shirts than a film about weird ass humans with button noses CGI'd onto them with the chipmunk voice. In a world where that Cats movie and pre-redesign Movie!Sonic existed, I am grateful the guys making the movies were like "Fuck that, make him a little guy". And I respect that.

- 1/12/2025

Decided to give shaving my legs and pits a chance after years of not doing so. Took like two hours because I have only a simple shaving razor and not an electric one or nair or whatever. And it's literally freezing right now in the dead of winter so my legs are now cold. :C

- 1/11/2025

So, I've been contemplating a lot about my gender and what it means to me. I used to feel quite like a girl growing up, but with male and neutral aspects, I used to be with other girls all the time. When I say "used to", I'm referring to when I was in elementary school, I'd love being called a lady. In middle school, I was more of a tomboy but I still had an obsession with lolita fashion and wanted to wear it so, so bad. High school, I bounced right back into fashion hardcore, wearing makeup everyday and dressing up like crazy...Except I was dressing in goth clothes, which everyone is convinced is automatically masculine/androgynous on women?? Weird lol anyways...

However, today? I feel unworthy of femininity, I feel unworthy of being considered a girl. Halfway through high school, I had to switch to homeschooling and was completely isolated because of it. To keep it brief, I was then in a lot of abusive friendships, one after another, up until I met my current partner, Pearl.

Over time, I felt like I lost touch with my femininity and lost the right to be a woman. To identify with femininity. I lost contact with the world and came out traumatized. I felt tainted. I feel lost. I look at women my current age and feel like I've lost something they have. I feel lost in female spaces, simultaneously feeling safe yet like I don't belong because. I lost the thing.

As I've been thinking about it, I notice I still yearn for femininity. I want to be a girl, I find myself dreaming of being treated like one by the one I'm madly in love with, having my body touched and considered "female". But yet, I feel like I'm on the outside looking in, as though I don't come from here.

I step away from my whole "I just can't be a girl anymore, I'm ugly/don't know how to woman/don't connect with them anymore/I can be a girly guy and that works just fine!" but someone who's not a woman doesn't pine for being one.

I've come to accept I'm genderfluid in the masculine and androgynous way, but it seems I've denied myself the right to femininity out of self-loathing. Maybe it's time to come back to it on my own terms and see how it goes.

I don't think I'm not a man or miscellaneous genderless goblin, but I think it's time to see about adding "cute girl thing" to my list of "things I am".

- 1/7/2025

Replaying Ace Attorney Investigations (this time its the HD remake version) and WHITE WOMAN WHO RUINED MY LIFE (AKA Calisto Yew) is here. If you know you know.

Update: She laughed in my face

- 1/6/2025

I'm 5 chapters into Pink Panties, and I'm currently about to start a side comic, and frankly, the way the online world speaks about webcomics is just insane to me. Like, don't get me wrong, making comics consistently is work, yes, you have to put time and energy into it, especially if you want to make something serialized.

But also, people online talk like you have to have a damn license and 60 years of experience just to start one single webcomic that is meticulously planned from start to finish to where you exactly how they'll breathe on your 72nd chapter in 2065. I know this is because people are used to them as "webtoons" being made by entire teams, but I'm saddened by how people have become convinced that webcomics have a bar to entry.

They don't. They really fucking don't.

If you can draw and write dialogue of any kind, you can make a webcomic. You don't need to be a good artist, you don't need to have amazing writing, you don't need to have some epic tale to tell nor do you need to be the funniest guy on the planet. If you feel passionate about drawing and writing and you wanna make a comic, just go for it! There's billions of comics that are just shitposting with your OCs. Actually, you don't even need to have original, distinctive characters. Some webcomics are just fanfiction where its your blorbos' shenanigans, while others are the author's self-insert making funny observations about things they find interesting.

Really, just get started and have fun! See what works! You don't have to make it polished, you don't have to make it fully colored or look good or have a deep plot or anything like that if you don't want to. It's all voluntary. Webcomic making is a hobby, so why not treat it like one?

- 1/5/2025

The way How Fish Is Made and Mouthwashing are tied together is multifaceted, as not only is there the DLC The Last One and Then Another that acts as a prequel to the latter, it's actually a complete sentence when paired together: "Fish want me (How Fish Is Made), women fear me (Mouthwashing).

On a serious note I just realized how the tongue-eating parasite and tongueless fish duo perfectly match Jimmy and Curly; Both allegedly "great coworkers" as said by a parasite who has everything to gain from leeching off someone who can no longer speak for themselves and is basically at the mercy of them. That's actually super cool in hindsight and I dunno if it was intentional; if it was, then holy shit, I love that continuous symbolism, and if not, that's still a neat coincidence.